It was one of those lazy Sunday afternoons, the kind where the house feels calm, and everything seems to move a little slower. I had just wrapped up my chores and called Zayn to join me for our Quran time. I expected some resistance—after all, this wasn’t my first rodeo.
As predicted, he had an excuse ready: “I’m tired, Mama,” followed by the classic, “Can I play my game instead?” His small voice carried a mix of reluctance and pleading, and I could see it in his eyes—he didn’t want to disappoint me, but he also didn’t want to sit down for something that felt like a chore.
I’ll admit, my heart sank for a moment. I wanted him to love this time, to see it as a gift rather than an obligation. Forcing him wasn’t an option—that would only create resentment, and the last thing I wanted was for him to associate the Quran with pressure. So, I sat there, thinking. If I wanted him to truly connect with the Quran, I’d need to approach it differently. It was time to switch gears, to meet him where he was, and try something new.
I know most moms like me struggle with moments like these. It’s hard, isn’t it? You know deep in your heart how crucial it is for your kids to learn the Quran, to build a lifelong connection with its teachings, and to excel in their recitation. You want nothing more than to see them grow up with the Quran as their guide, their comfort, and their strength. But with the whirlwind of a busy schedule—chores, work, and everything else—it can feel overwhelming to tackle this challenge. It’s exhausting, both emotionally and physically. But before we dive into solutions, we need to take a step back and really understand why our kids sometimes resist. Understanding the “why” is the key to finding a way forward, one that nurtures their love for the Quran without turning it into a battle.
Why Do Kids Push Back on Quran Time?
Before we jump into finding solutions, it’s so important to take a moment and really think about why our kids might feel reluctant to read the Quran. It’s rarely about the Quran itself—it’s often about the environment we create, how they’re feeling emotionally, or even how we’re presenting Quran time to them. Kids are naturally drawn to things that feel exciting, meaningful, and connected to their world, but when something feels too difficult, overwhelming, or like a chore, it’s no surprise that they resist. From personal experience and the countless conversations I’ve had with other moms, I’ve come to realize that there are a few common reasons why this happens. And understanding these reasons? That’s where the real change begins.
1. The Struggle with Waiting for Results
Today’s kids are growing up in a world where instant gratification is everywhere. Whether it’s unlocking a new level in a video game with just a few taps, receiving a quick burst of excitement from a like or comment online, or diving into their favorite show the moment they feel bored, everything around them offers immediate rewards. In contrast, Quran reading feels entirely different—it’s a slower, more deliberate process that requires patience, focus, and effort. The benefits of engaging with the Quran, like the peace it brings to the heart or the sense of accomplishment after learning a new surah, aren’t always immediate. For kids used to quick results and fast-paced stimulation, it can feel less rewarding at first, making it harder for them to stay motivated.
Research in child psychology indicates that children often avoid activities they perceive as difficult or boring, particularly when these tasks lack immediate reinforcement. This avoidance behaviour is linked to the absence of prompt positive feedback, which is crucial for maintaining children's engagement and motivation. The American Psychological Association (APA) 1 emphasizes the importance of immediate and consistent reinforcement to encourage desired behaviours in children. For instance, the APA suggests that offering compromises can be an effective tactic for immediate behaviour improvements, regardless of the type of behaviour.
So you know, here we have THE PROBLEM Why zayn is not catching up with learning the Quran
2. Not Fully Understanding the Quran’s True Purpose
For many kids, reading the Quran can feel like just another task on their to-do list—a chore they’re asked to complete without truly understanding its deeper meaning or significance. Without a clear sense of why it matters, it’s hard for them to connect with the practice on a personal level. They might not see how it contributes to their spiritual growth, helps them build character, or strengthens their connection to Allah. And when they look around and see their friends or classmates not engaging in similar activities, it can make Quran reading feel even more isolating or out of place. Without that understanding of its purpose, it’s easy for kids to view it as something they’re just “supposed” to do, rather than a meaningful and enriching part of their lives.
3. Let’s Not Forget the Pressure Thing!
Sometimes, without even realizing it, we end up creating a negative vibe around Quran learning with the way we talk about it. Phrases like, “You have to do this,” or “Why aren’t you reading yet?” might come from a place of concern or urgency, but to kids, they can feel like pressure. It’s almost like we’re turning Quran time into a task they’re being scolded for not completing, instead of something they can enjoy and look forward to. Think about it—how many of us like being told we have to do something? Kids are no different. They might start associating Quran learning with stress or frustration, which is the last thing we want. Instead, shifting to a gentler, more encouraging tone—like saying, “Let’s sit together and read for a while,” or “I’d love to hear you recite”—can make all the difference. It turns the experience into something positive and collaborative, rather than a demand.
Research within the framework of Self-Determination Theory (SDT)2 reveals that external pressures, such as controlling feedback, often lead to resistance instead of motivation by undermining a person’s sense of autonomy. Studies, like Deci’s 1971 experiments, show that external pressure of learning can decrease intrinsic motivation when they shift the focus away from personal enjoyment to external control. This aligns with Cognitive Evaluation Theory3, which explains how external events perceived as controlling reduce autonomy and engagement. These findings suggest that fostering intrinsic motivation requires minimizing external pressures.
4. Juggling Too Many Things
Moms, I know exactly how you feel—our kids’ schedules these days are nothing short of chaotic. Between school, extracurriculars, sports practices, piles of homework, and those moments where they just want to chill and play, it feels like every minute of the day is accounted for. Add Quran reading to the mix, and suddenly, it’s like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Let’s be honest—when your child is already balancing so much, asking them to carve out even 10 or 15 minutes for Quran time can feel like just another demand, both for them and for you. And let’s not even get started on how fast-paced everything has become. It’s hard to slow down, especially when the world around us is constantly rushing. But here’s the thing—we’re all in the same boat, trying to figure out how to make it work without adding more pressure. Finding that balance between prioritizing Quran time and respecting their packed schedules can feel overwhelming, but it’s not impossible. You’re definitely not alone in navigating this!
Solution Time: How Zayn Finally Got On Board
Alright moms, here’s the deal—these are the four main issues I’ve noticed from my own experience and a bit of digging around. Now, let me spill the tea on what actually worked to get Zayn more into Quran learning.
After a lot of thinking and trying different things (some total fails, let me tell you), I started experimenting with different ways to get Zayn more into reading the Quran. It wasn’t just about making him sit down and go through the motions—it was about helping him build a real connection with it, something he could actually feel good about. And honestly, it took some patience, but I found a few things that really clicked for him. Here’s what worked:
1. Bringing Quran Stories to Life
Let’s face it—kids love stories, especially ones that spark their imagination and curiosity. So instead of just telling Zayn to sit and read, I decided to make it more engaging by introducing him to the stories behind the Quran. For example, I started with the story of Prophet Yusuf (AS). I focused on the emotions and lessons, like how he showed so much patience and trust in Allah through all his struggles. Zayn was hooked!
Then, I took it a step further—I showed him the actual verses in the Quran where this story is mentioned. I told him, “You can read about this amazing journey yourself right here!” It made the Quran feel more real and exciting to him, like he was uncovering something incredible, not just reading words on a page. That little shift sparked a curiosity I hadn’t seen before!
Why It Does the Trick: Here’s the cool part—there’s actual science behind why storytelling works so well for kids. According to a study published in Frontiers in Psychology4, storytelling lights up the brain’s sensory cortex, which is the part responsible for processing things like sights, sounds, and emotions. Basically, it helps kids feel the story, making it way more vivid and memorable. So when we bring Quranic stories to life, it’s not just entertainment—it’s creating a connection that sticks with them on a deeper level. It’s like turning the Quran into an adventure they can’t wait to explore.
2. Winning Them Over with Rewards
To make Quran time feel less like a chore and more like something Zayn could look forward to, I set up a simple reward system. After each session he completed, he earned a star on a chart we made together. Once he collected five stars, he got to pick a small reward—sometimes it was a trip to the park, sometimes a treat, or even extra time to play his favourite game. It turned Quran reading into something exciting for him, and he loved seeing those stars add up!
Why It Does the Trick: There’s actual science to back this up too. Research by Dr. Edward Deci, a psychologist 5who studies motivation, shows that positive reinforcement is super effective, especially when paired with activities that kids see as meaningful. It helps build their intrinsic interest over time. So, while the rewards gave Zayn that extra nudge to stick with it, he also started to find his own joy in the process, which was the real win.
Letting Him Take the Lead
Instead of laying down the law with a strict schedule, I asked Zayn when he felt like sitting down to read. Giving him a say in the process made a world of difference—it put him in the driver’s seat, and suddenly Quran time didn’t feel like something being forced on him. He felt more in control, and the resistance started to fade.
Why It Does the Trick: Here’s the psychology behind it: A study published in Child Development Perspectives6 shows that autonomy-supportive parenting—basically, giving kids choices and a sense of ownership—leads to higher motivation and longer-lasting engagement. When kids feel like they have a voice, they’re way more likely to stick with something and even enjoy it. It’s all about making them feel like it’s their choice, not just another rule they have to follow.
Walkin’ the Talk: Keepin’ It Consistent
Zayn often noticed me sitting with the Quran after Fajr, quietly starting my day in a peaceful way. One morning, I turned to him and said, “You know, beginning my day like this feels so calming. How about you join me tomorrow, even if it’s just for five minutes?” I didn’t expect much, but to my surprise, he agreed. That one small step turned into a habit over time—something we now share regularly.
Why It Does the Trick: Kids are always watching us, even when we think they’re not. They learn more from what we do than what we say. When they see you genuinely enjoying an activity, especially something like reading the Quran, it naturally piques their interest. It’s not about forcing them—it’s about leading by example in a way they can’t help but want to follow.
Have you ever been in the same boat with your kids? You know, trying to get them excited about Quran learning but feeling stuck when they’re just not into it? What tricks, tips, or strategies have you tried that actually worked? I’d love to hear your stories and ideas—drop them in the comments below so we can all learn from each other!
At AlQuranClasses, we’ve got all the perfect solutions for the challenges moms face when it comes to teaching Quran to their kids. Our programs are designed to create a friendly, supportive, and interactive environment where kids actually enjoy learning. We make Quran learning meaningful, fun, and something your child will look forward to. Who says teaching Quran can’t be stress-free and enjoyable for both moms and kids? Let us help you make it happen!
Sources of Wisdom
https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2015/08/punishing-child
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-determination_theory
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_evaluation_theory
https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/human-neuroscience/articles/10.3389/fnhum.2020.00253/full
https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/1972_Deci_JPSP.pdf
https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/human-neuroscience/articles/10.3389/fnhum.2020.00253/full
For mom's in this situation, these are all great methods to implement. I love your AI artwork you incorporated here. They are very good.
As an adult learning to read the Quran in Arabic, my Quran teacher is extremely patient. I'm very grateful. I do feel like a kid, though, learning to read all over again. My mistakes are palpable. I still mix up letters and letter combos, but I'm getting there. My Quran teacher always gently guides me and doesn't push me faster than what I can go. It helps.